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The "It Doesn't Come Around" thread 
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Malekith's Best Friend
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Joined: Mon Jul 21, 2003 4:48 pm
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Location: Naggaroth...where the ice cream never melts
This thread is dedicated to those situations where your dice rolls are so frighteningly consistent that you know what will happen before you roll. Because that's how your dice always roll, no matter the odds. The roll that has gone one way so many times that, sooner or later, you just know it's going to go the other way. But it never does.

For me, I always know before I roll that the following will happen:

-I will pass rally tests on my harpies
-I will fail to kill a model shooting with my Chariots (not one...ever!)
-I will roll 5 or 6 with impact hits, even against my own models.

Mostly I want to read other people's funny stories of how they can't lose/win with a certain roll. But I'm also wondering if karma isn't happening and if somewhere out there is the person who has the opposite of my three.

So, what stories do you have?


Tue Dec 08, 2009 1:18 am
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Purveyor of Pain
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Back in the good old 6th ed. days, I played against a skaven player. He shot his warp lightning cannon at my hydra. He rolled a strength of two. Now, laughing, I said "roll a six." He did. I then said,"I'll fail my save." I promptly did. Then I said, "roll six wounds." He did. Barbeque anyone.....

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Tue Dec 08, 2009 2:11 am
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Dragon Lord
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When my shades shoot, and I say "they will kill a model" they *will* kill a model.

They shot after moving, at long range, against a unit hidden in a building, double shot of course (-6 to hit)

Killed one model. No more, no less.

Also, my hydras either take no wound for the entire game, proving resilent beyond all hope and being killed.

Or fail first 5 regen rolls in a row and die horribly. No middle ground.

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Tue Dec 08, 2009 2:18 am
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Shade
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Location: A Crag of Coal - Ostrava, Czech Republic
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My CO chariots (mounts and riders included) always inflict 1-2 wounds. Always. No exceptions.

Harpies break and never rally.

Appr. 1/4 - 1/5 of all 'to hit' and 'to wound' rolls are 1's. On the contrary, 5/6 once or twice per battle when rolling LD is the norm.

When I played Lizardmen for a while in the 6th edition, saurus knights inflicted 3 wounds regardless of their foe.

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Tue Dec 08, 2009 3:17 am
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Dragon Lord
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Oh yeah, got another one.
if a unit of crossbowmen with a sorceress in it (has to be a sorceress in it) flees for any reason. They will *not* rally no matter what.

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7th edition army book:
Games Played: 213
Games Won: 114 (54%)
Games Drawn: 33 (15%)
Games Lost: 66 (31%)

8th Edition army book W/D/L:
Druchii: 36/4/16


Tue Dec 08, 2009 3:23 am
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Dark Rider

Joined: Fri Jan 07, 2005 10:28 pm
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Every time I issue or accept a challenge with my Orcs & Goblins I lose. No matter how uber my character and how lowly the champion I never manage to win a challenge.

(There has been one exception: Grimgor Ironhide, who has never lost a challenge the few times I've used him.)

Also every time I face an army with a cannon that also has an engineer or other character attached I KNOW they will pass any misfire re-roll. In 12 years I have not seen a cannon fail a re-roll for a misfire test.


Tue Dec 08, 2009 3:32 am
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Corsair
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Joined: Fri Mar 14, 2008 10:00 pm
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This thread is in the line of the following ones:

Murphy's unwritten rules of warhammer (some wise philosophy about what not to expect too much)
Heroic Performances (the inexpected best)
Funniest/most unreasonable deaths and kills
Terrible rolling odds (the inexpected worse)
Worst battles you've ever played (if you lost, see that it could be worse)

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Tue Dec 08, 2009 7:20 am
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Malekith's Best Friend
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I have given up on Life Taker because every time I shoot, one will miss and the 2 hits never wound. I cant even kill dam goblin fantatics with it.

And Dalamar, my Hydra seems to have your Hydras problem lol. It always ends the game with 5 wounds or 0 wounds.

In 40k my Melta guns will roll above 10 at close range against a Rhino no worries, against Land Raiders they cannot, and I mean CANNOT roll above 3. Oh and my Lascannond always roll penetrating hits against the LRs, but then will undoubtably roll a 1 or 2 on the damage table...

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Tue Dec 08, 2009 9:03 am
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Noble
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my hero with the pendant will fail every save against S5+ so I took a talisman of protection instead (proved to be a good choice :shock:)

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Tue Dec 08, 2009 3:37 pm
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Shade
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Location: A Crag of Coal - Ostrava, Czech Republic
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Oh, and I forgot.. Manbane rending stars assassin always kills 2-3 heavy cavalry models, the unit then fails panic (WOC Nurgle Knights included). It's 5 consecutive battles now.

Edit: Typo

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Odi ergo sum - Druchii's illumination


DE noble is talking to a HE prisoner

DE: 'Do you know the difference between you and me?'

HE: 'Hmmmmmgh'

DE: 'That's right, I've still got my tounge.' - Anon


Tue Dec 08, 2009 5:31 pm
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Beastmaster
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If I use 3+ power dice, I will always get an irresistable force. I have never rolled a miscast. People hate my magic heavy army, its ridiculous.

My hydra seems to be the same as the others have mentioned, no middle ground.

My harpies will always run behind my battle lines, then proceed to rally once they have failed to screen or deflect charges.

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Wed Dec 09, 2009 12:42 am
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Malekith's Best Friend
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If there's an opportunity for my Cold One knights to turn Stupid and stumble into a friendly model, they will do so. This usually happens after a Hatred-related overrun, where the positioning of one unit or another is harder to control. The last game, they stumbled into a unit of Shades with Assassin in the turn that both units were going to combine-charge a Hell Pit Abomination. The game before that, they stumbled into my dragon-riding Dreadlord just as he was about to rear-charge a Clanrat regiment containing BSB and General.

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Wed Dec 09, 2009 2:58 am
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Black Guard
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-My harpies pass all leadership tests, in general's range or not.
-My corsair champion (tho he hasnt been fielded a lot since the last book), kills vampires in challenges. He's killed 4 so far, with incredible, stupid luck
-Chariot Impact Hit rolls are 1 or 2
-My RendingStar Assasin will miss, and then fail to wound what he did hit
-A succesfull spirit of the forge will wipe an enemy knight units, weather they'r 5 or 10 strong.

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Wed Dec 09, 2009 8:01 am
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Noble
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O got another one: my mages will never cast with irrisistable force, unless my ring of hotek is just within 12 inc.

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Wed Dec 09, 2009 8:48 am
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Malekith's Best Friend
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Location: Naggaroth...where the ice cream never melts
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no one wrote:
my hero with the pendant will fail every save against S5+ so I took a talisman of protection instead (proved to be a good choice :shock:)


That is just amazing. Really and truly amazing.


Wed Dec 09, 2009 3:00 pm
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Prophet of Tzeentch
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In any given game a single level two sorc will always roll Black Horror as one of her spells and will allways get of a Black Horror at irisitable force at some point. Doesn't matter who its against. I regulaly used to face (6th ed) someone who allways took a Slaan (usualy Kroak) and at least two Skink Preists. And still this one level 2 sorc was worth her wight in gold.

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Thu Dec 10, 2009 1:18 pm
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Malekith's Best Friend
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Magic will kill off more of your own troops than your enemy's...

Never been different, except once when battling skaven where one black horror made whole the army flee.

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Fri Dec 11, 2009 4:18 pm
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Assassin

Joined: Mon May 22, 2006 2:13 am
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My harpies are amazing at baiting, redirecting, fleeing and then rallying on their own leadership, however they absolutely suck in combat. I've charged brettonina peasant archers in the flank and lost. They did rally after that though :D And warmachine crews give them fits too, I don't quite understand it.


Fri Dec 11, 2009 5:11 pm
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Highborn

Joined: Wed Mar 08, 2006 6:05 pm
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Location: Lurking in the dark caves of Milan (Italy)
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I play Chaos Dwarfs, so my hobgoblins and orcs have the advantage to use my dwarf general leadership of 10 like my dwarfs.
The only difference is that greenskin tends to always pass their leadershp tests, dwarfs sometimes fail. I dunno why, they have the same leadership of 10 (thanks to general) but they perfom differently!

Another funny episode.
There is a guy in my club that always kiss his dices before important rolls, during a battle I was sick of him always rolling good and me rolling bad and I challenged him I'd use his own trick starting to kiss my dices too...... it worked! I passed every test since..... :shock:

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Sat Dec 12, 2009 2:07 pm
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Malekith's Best Friend
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My General will fail any leadership test he is required to take, while a single Harpy after getting butchered, stabbed and surrounded by hundreds of terror causing enemies will always hold her ground.

Power of Darkness always gives me back the same dice I started with.
Rune of Khaine may as well have stayed at +1 attack.
Chariot Impact hits are always sixes followed by the chariot getting destroyed regardless.

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Sun Dec 13, 2009 3:49 am
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Cold One Knight

Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2009 12:27 pm
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Location: Yorkhire, The True North!
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For me:

Chartios win - regardless of what enemy you charge, hopelessly outnumbered against a million str 7 attacks, my lone CoC will win.

Giants, when charging, will always get yell and bawl, thus ignoring your 7 str 7 attacks from great weapon wielding Lord and BSB!

Shades will domniate a battlefield like some ancient god of war, or be killed by a crazed fanatic almost instantly!

a unit of ten RXB will kill more t4 models than a Reaper will do - fact

A reaper will not be able to hit a giant, and should you hit him, you will never wound. On the other hand, a reaper will ALWAYS hit a fanatic or single character, and NEVER wound them!

Magic sucks - no matter how many wizards you take, you will never get the spell you need to win the battle and instead have to grimace as his sole level 1 wizard gets an amazing spell and manages to cast it with irresistable force three times in a battle.

Dark Riders, even when charged by an opponents fast cavalary always win. Its a rule, if they did not, the universe would implode!

Your invivcinble general with regen and PoK will die.
Your general with heavy armour and sea dragon cloak cannot be hurt by the enemies weapons!

Just a few of my experiences

D


Sun Dec 13, 2009 10:49 am
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Shade
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After forty games or so with my O&G i have never failed my test for nibits itty ring

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Tue Dec 15, 2009 6:29 pm
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Warrior
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My harpies never kill anything, they just die and run away. And everyone knows it now so they fire off a quick shot with something at them and they willingly oblige.

My executioners always die before doing anything, even when I give them the ASF banner (BSB). On the few occasions that I really amazingly manage to set them up to charge and the opponent falls for it, they will fail a fear test and then get run over the next turn. Usually they don't even get a chance to run either, they are cut down to a man.

My chariot always pop on the first turn. I now have another one to see if lightning will strike twice every battle.

On the plus side, my lone unit of spearelves will always be alive at the end of the battle, usually after beating someone up twice their size.


Tue Dec 22, 2009 5:31 pm
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Noble
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Long time ago when I played 40k on a regular basis(playing Necrons) I would have this gut feeling when I would roll a 6 to explode a vehicle. It could be 20 hits or 1 hit, I would just get this feeling that I would get a 6 and boom goes the rhino, landraider whatever I was shooting at.

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Fri Dec 25, 2009 2:53 am
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Trainee Warrior

Joined: Thu Apr 30, 2009 4:15 am
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I got one with my skaven, my plague furance whenever i hit combats and need to roll high for it's wrecking ball, i always roll 2's and misfires. Then against my mate where i charged some trashy unit that had already taken enough wounds to auto break from fear i roll up 10. happened twice rolling 10 against units that had already lost.


Wed Mar 17, 2010 10:12 am
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