The bleeding elf

Muse of harganeth · Post by **Muse of harganeth** » Sat Apr 01, 2006 6:44 am

Part 1

I first saw Jagiy, at the house, at about midnight 1 year ago. He was hooded in red and his hands stained with blood. I prayed to Sigmar that he was not coming to rent my house. Some how I knew my hopes were far too high.

He was tall slender and his ears were pierced in every place I could imagine. His black hair quavered in the wind, and the ghostly white tips on the end shone. He was so like an elf, yet he could not have been; never have I seen such a demonic figure, even by chaos standards. His voice was tired and desperate...
"You’re renting.... I'll take it!" That was all he said.

I could have said the room was taken. I could of said no. I could've taken my crossbow and shot him right between the head. But I didn't.
The room had been for rent months on end, and I needed cash and fast. He wasn't the type I would like lurking around in my basement, but Money meant everything.
"Err... Come..."
And he walked in without me finishing the sentence.
He even knew where to go too!

The next day I bought him down some food. I crept down the stairs, dreading what I would find; A Demon from chaos? A vampire? Some axe wielding menace? Maybe just a dead body?
No nothing. Just a man sleeping on the floor. His Odd possessions littered the room, a long stick with a skull on the end of it, a sword, probably of demonic origin, a small tree and his clothes. I went up stairs and dropped plonked the food on the table. I went down with a mattress and a blanket. I placed it down on the basement floors and folded the Blanket neatly on top. I then roused the sleeper.
It was not the welcome I wanted.

"Fool! How dare you rouse the great Jagiy! And what is this! You insolent barstard! Why did you think, me off all people need a mattress! Of all things! Out, Out! Out I say!"
That’s politeness these days. I hated it that.
"How about you! Come in at midnight, and now expect me to leave my own room! What are you? a Slanneshite? A fiend of Khorne? A..."
I never really got much further. At the word Slannesh, he jumped up and reached for his stick.
"How dare you utter that name! Let Khaine destroy your feeble home!"
It was the Khaine that did it. Not many people uttered the name of Khaine aloud. Only Elves, and there was only one kind that did.
" Druchii are you? Well, well, well! A Druchii in my humble home! What the hell are you doing here!”?

Soulreaper · Post by **Soulreaper** » Sat Apr 01, 2006 6:55 am

very interesting ^^ apart from a few spelling mishaps I'm very intrigued ^^

Seanzala · Post by **Seanzala** » Sat Apr 01, 2006 7:07 am

Well, you've built up to a climax, any chance of part two?

It's not bad so far, but, as Soulreaper said, a couple of spelling mistakes.

Sean

Muse of harganeth · Post by **Muse of harganeth** » Sat Apr 01, 2006 7:33 am

sorry, i was in a bit of a hurry, even though it says i've been online for a while. I've just had a tutor over, and instead of turning of my computer, i acciently left it on. Thank you for the support, and yes there will be a part 2, if there wasn't all you know is that he's a druchii. Full stop. I bet you couldn't guess what happens next...

Edited the part! Now it's fine!

Lamehk the slavemaster · Sat Apr 01, 2006 9:22 am

its good. but then i say all of these things are good. because they are. i still say they are good. a bit too repetive?

Raziel02 · Post by **Raziel02** » Sat Apr 01, 2006 9:43 am

It make a change to read normal situations, a lot of stories begin with battles or something to that discription, so its good to see youve taken a different response, personally, i dont take mutch notice to spelling or puncuation, as this will improve as you continue to write, i look forward to the next part, good work.

Muse of harganeth · Post by **Muse of harganeth** » Sun Apr 02, 2006 9:39 pm

He seemed stuned. The word Druchii had melted in his mouth, and sunk down into his stomach. It was horrible to watch. A noble elf, even of this lost kind, acting like a chaos mutant.
He finnaly broke the silence, and quickly went back to his harsh tongue.

"You gussed right weakling! I am a Druchii, but what am i doing here?
Well thats another story.
I can't say it without the hole of Naggorand knowing!
Bah, we are much more powerfull than your puny magicians, including me!
I know magic, far beyond any of your races level!
And you shall never be more powerfull than I!"

He must have been very distressed. Anyone could have worked out why he was here.

"Oh, so your a sorcerer are you! Fleeing! practiced dark... Ha ha! Light magic!" I laughed.

"Fool! You shall pay one day! Yes you nearly got it right. I am a male sorcerer, and shall allways be. But I did not practice the foolish light magic!
It is weak, no killing, no death! But male sorcerers are forbidden in naggorath, so no-one must, or can not be one!
So I was an out cast! But I still practiced magic, for i new it flowed through my vains!
My mother, and her mother befor me were all excelent fighters, and magicians!
They were the Raven family! But we had no alligence to the witch king, no!
We were proud and free, and declared are allegence to Morathi!
But my last servant was a spy!
The idiot told everyone, and by midnight I had 20 troops on my door step.
But I got away! I cast the dreaded black horror! I knew the lores of Dark magic, Shadow and Death! I was that powerfull!
I flead away into the night, on the steed of shadow!
I flead right into the night, and into your feeble country!
But they will be after me! They follow my every move..."

"Well you have a good story, but i ain't want 20 dark elves in my house, no!
And I don't want you either. Hell knows what you'll do to me! It could be magic, or worse! Necromancy! You just won't tell me, because they will kick you out!

This will be the first part in conclusion. The next part will be from the Sorcerors point of veiw, then will change within parts. Sound kind of weird, but yeah It's just to get both point of veiw, and could be kind of cool.