My Asur Fluff project... Druchii input required!

Arellion sapher · Post by **Arellion sapher** » Sat Oct 24, 2009 12:58 am

Thanks again for some very valuable advice.

I think Syjahel 'got' the Shadow Warriors bit - although I'll grant you I was playing up to media tropes. The idea basically goes that the Shadow Warriors are doing their own thing in Naggaroth and have been for centuries. They found Tholtan and rushed in at the last minute. As they would. And the best part? We'll never see them again. (probably) But they're out there, fighting the long war. Forever.

Bear in mind that only Darethis and Tholtan got out... although we only saw four out of eight die. This is important.

I'll keep an eye on the future "movement/continuity" stuff. I tried to make this one a little more episodic, but I may have to watch that habit in the future.

Thanks for your praise of my descriptive language. I was trying to channel Tolkien, although I think I managed a second-rate Pullman at best. Especially the Darkblade comment - that's... a very big compliment. Next instalment may be up next week... we'll see.

Post by **Drainial** » Tue Oct 27, 2009 11:46 am

I don't think its the fact that they got out, thats entierly up to you; but rather the manner of their rescue. It did seem a little over dramatic. That said I still enjoyed it immensly, though I couldn't figure out why the shades would leave the forest cover to take the sea gaurd on up close. On the other hand having them mown down in an ambush wouldn't have been nearly so entertaining to read so there we go.

As an aside I didn't have any problem following the movements of the group, it all seemed fairly clear to me. Keep it up.

Yemeth · Post by **Yemeth** » Sun Nov 15, 2009 2:08 am

Greetings Arellion, the only worthy of Asur, ummm sorry for maintaining the somewhat pressure, but when is the next part coming out?
Thank you.

Syjahel · Post by **Syjahel** » Sun Nov 15, 2009 3:00 am

I'd like to second that

Shall there be more? You have a keen audience in Naggaroth.

Sweeping death · Post by **Sweeping death** » Fri Feb 05, 2010 12:02 pm

Greetings! I´ve read the story so far and liked it a lot! It really makes one want to continue reading. And it served as a great inspiration for the hobby, giving life to the minis and motivation to work and paint them.

Look forward to the next part. Cheers!